Author's Comments: Well, yet, another fic.  I've always thought of writing a fic post Countdown to Destruction, but an idea never came to me of how I wanted to handle until now.  Basically,  I wrote this fic based on what I would have done if I were T.J. in his place.  After reading this, you'll get the idea of how I would have felt about the whole "last battle to save the Earth" thing.  I hope you enjoy reading it.  If you have any comments, feel free to email me.  Thanks.  :)

Author's Thanks: Wow, there's a number of people to thank. :)  First off, like to thank WhiteZeo for her help and inspiration and keeping me going with it, although it might not be the most sophisticated fic in the world. :)  Like to thank my friend T.J.335 for helping with ideas and doing final edits.  I'd like to thank PRRed1 for going over certain ideas an giving me opinions on them, as well as helping me come up with a teaser. :)  Last, but not least, thanks to Starhawk for putting up with my selfish asking of her to edit it, while she was sick.  You're great, Starhawk... "Or something...". :)

Well, the war is finally over.  Hard to believe it had to come down to the way it did.  I never imagined that the person we were fighting to rescue would be ultimately destroyed to save us.  I guess when you're as good as Zordon was, you would be willing to sacrifice yourself for the purposes of others.  The galaxy has finally been cleansed of evil, but has it truly been?  I'm not sure, but I guess we should enjoy the victory over evil for now.

I sat the huge crate back into the Megaship as Cassie followed up behind me.

"That should be the last of it."

Carlos came to join up with me and Cassie as Kinwan and Tykwa began to speak to us.

"Why don't you stay on KO-35 for a while?  You've earned a vacation," Tykwa suggested with a smile.

"Why, thank you, but.. I think we're a little homesick," Carlos thanked, but declined with a bit of humor.

I gave Cassie a small smile after Carlos' comment, and she returned one as well.

Carlos, Tykwa, and Kinwan continued to talk and Cassie began to get involved as well.  I slipped away unnoticed and walked along a sidewalk of the galactic urban city had and came upon a quiet, serene area.  I stood and stared at the gorgeous view that was before me.  Trees spanned the area, with lakes and streams embedded in the ground, and a beautiful mountain range streaming behind them as a border.  This was indeed a beautiful view.  However, a sudden dread consumed my heart and mind.  Things would no longer be the same for me, as well as the other Rangers.  The whole world knew of our identities as Power Rangers.  Could it be possible to have a normal life again?  No, of course not.  Power Rangers were a big deal even before I became the Red Turbo Ranger.  People always wondered who they were.  And now that they knew who the Rangers were that saved the planet Earth, undoubtedly they would try to learn more about us.  No, there is no way to obtain a normal life again.

"T.J.!" a voice called out to me from a far distance.  It was Cassie, smiling and making her way towards me.

"Hey, I was wondering where you went.  You okay?" Cassie questioned standing beside me.

"Yeah, I'm fine.  Just thinking of some things at the moment," I responded.

Cassie.... a true friend indeed.  I cared deeply for her.  Always there for her, no matter what.  However, my feelings for her, ever since our Turbo days, a feeling in my heart desired to tell her I loved her.  But no, that's not right.  Her heart belongs to the Phantom, the man of mystery.  I can't nor would I put her in a predicament to choose, but still, could I have the courage to tell her how I feel anyway?

"Wow, this is beautiful," Cassie uttered looking out with amazement.

"Yes, indeed it is," I stated.

I sighed a bit and shut my eyes for a moment.  Things are no longer the same.

"We should probably get back.  The others are probably ready to go," Cassie suggested.

I nodded and Cassie began making her way back to the Megaship.  I stood for a moment, savoring the final moments of the view and followed Cassie.

'Alpha, let's go home' and with these final words, we were finally on our course home.  Ashley's sadness turned into joy with Andros's decision to come with us, along with Karone and Zhane.  It would be a while before we would reach Earth though.  Everyone was talking on the Bridge, and once again, I slipped out unnoticed.  I seem to be getting good at that.  I walked down the long hallway.  For the first time, I was actually walking down it not tending to an emergency on Earth, or checking out weird readings on the Megaship.  For some strange reason, as I attempted enter my room, I checked to see if anyone was around.  I have no idea why I'm acting so secretively.  I have no reason to.  I sighed in exasperation and entered normally.  The room was pitch dark and I stumbled over a shoe.  How embarrassing.  In the midst of trying to find my way around the small room, I finally came upon the desk and turned the lamp on.  No wonder I was tripping all over the place, I had stuff laying across the floor.  Go figure.

I had this sudden urge to just... do nothing.  Sit and await my fate on Earth.  I wonder how my mom would feel.  She didn't have the slightest idea that I would become a Power Ranger that day I left Crescent City.  I bet my Astro Morpher that our identities are being covered on every news station across the world.  It would only be a matter of time before she finds out, or perhaps she already knows.  The question in my mind though is how she would react to it.  I mean, it's not everyday you realize your son was a super hero and contributed to the fight to save the galaxy.

My attention was suddenly attracted to the window seat.  The stars... they were so beautiful from outer space. I decided to take a seat and see the millions of fiery gas balls pass by the millions.  There was a small tap at my door.

"Come in," I shouted and then turned my attention to the unlimited space that was outside the Megaship.

"Hey," a female voice said.  It was Cassie again.

"Oh hey, what's going on," I wondered.

"Nothing much, everyone wondered where you ran off to," Cassie noted with that gorgeous smile she always has.

I didn't say anything, but Cassie couldn't restrain herself from asking what was up with me.  That's one thing special about Cassie, always caring about her friends and willing to take time to talk with them.

"Teej, something is on your mind.  I can tell.  I've known you for a long time, I know some of your idiosyncrasies.  Come on, you can tell me what's on your mind," Cassie articulated putting her hand on my shoulder.

I directed my full attention and eye contact to her and then sort of gazed down at the floor.

"Well... as we were about to leave KO-35, it hit me that our lives are no longer the same.  Now that the world knows who we are, there is no refuge for us to run to.  I just know that everyone is going to be asking about this and that when we get back.  I don't want to deal with it," I confessed.

Cassie stood still for a moment.  I don't think she even had an easy answer for this problem.  I know for sure I didn't.  That's why it scared me.  Was there anyway to go on with a normal life now?

"Yeah, that's gonna be a problem," Cassie admitted.  "We're just going to have to figure out something."

In the middle of the conversation, I interjected with something I never thought I would say to Cassie in a long time.

"Cassie, can I be open with you for a minute," I asked firmly, but not to forward.

"Sure, go ahead, Teej.  I'm here for you," Cassie said with a smile.

I wanted to make eye contact, but I was reluctant.  However, I did find the inner spirit to hold her hand and caress it gently.

"Uh... Cass..., I just want to tell you my true feelings and all.  I know your heart belongs to the Phantom Ranger, but this is something I can no longer keep within myself.  Cassie, I love you," I proclaimed.  A feeling of heaviness consumed my heart and a feeling of hot embarrassment swam through my entire body.

"T.J.... I'm not sure what to say," Cassie said in a normal tone with no indications of being negative or positive with my confession.

"Look, you don't have to feel the same way.  I just needed to get that out of my heart.  It's been driving me nuts the past few months, so to get that out in the open has made me feel better," I declared with confidence getting to my feet.

Cassie had no response.  Instead she slowly exited my room and the door fell shut and darkness once again filled the room except for the tiny bit of light emanating from the lamp on the desk.  I knew she didn't feel the same way.  Whether she did or didn't, it didn't matter to me.  I just wanted to get that off my chest.

It must have been over an hour since we left KO-35.  An hour didn't seem that long to me though.  Felt like it had been over 3 hours at the time.  As I sat in my cold dark room, I had this strange wild idea.  Well, not really strange, but it might seem awkward to other people, but I decided to go ahead and go through it anyway.  I went to the Simudeck and inspected it and thought it might be a good idea to ask DECA for help with this.

"DECA, do you have photography capabilities?"

"Yes, T.J., along with other functions and abilities, I can also shoot photos," the super computer responded.

I smiled a bit and nodded my head in happiness. "Great, this is going to work out then.  Thanks DECA."

"My pleasure, T.J.," she replied.

I exited the Simudeck and searched for the other Rangers and Karone.  Fortunately, they were all together on the Bridge talking amongst themselves.  Everyone quickly turned their attention to me when I entered and the doors opened.  I felt like I was on stage or something.

"Hey, what's up," I greeted.

"Not much, just talking about some things.  What about you?  You all right, T.J.  Haven't seen much of you since our ascent from KO-35," Andros asked with the others staring at me.

"Uh... nothing.  Everything is all right, I just needed to do a few things.  Speaking of which, can I ask you guys a favor," I asked.

"Sure, what'cha need," Andros questioned with a smile.

"Well... I was wondering if you guys would take a photo with me at the Simudeck.  DECA said she has the abilities to do that sort of thing, and I need to take a picture with you guys for a special purpose."

"Yeah, sure thing," Andros accepted and looked at the others.  They nodded and smiled.

"Sounds cool," Carlos said.

"Thanks, I really appreciate this guys.  This is something really important to me."

"It's no prob, Teej," Zhane smiled hitting my shoulder as he walked past me.

I was rather surprised they didn't ask 'what' the special purpose was.  They just happily agreed to doing it.  I guess that sort of made things simple for me.

It took a while with the joking and horsing around, but we finally managed to get a photo taken with DECA and the Simudeck's assistance.  I set it to a moon like setting and we all lined up with our Astro Morphers and Zhane with his Digimorpher with a silly looking grin on his face.  Karone stood next to Andros with his arm around her, a true sign of affection of brotherly love for her.

"Ready DECA," I shouted.

"Taking photo.. now," DECA informed and huge flash appeared in front of us nearly blinding us.  As soon as the shooting was done we all laughed and carried on about how we couldn't see.  Zhane stumbled forward and Andros fell over him.  I sort of stumbled back while the others just continued to have a riot.  It was rather amusing.

"Processing photo," DECA noted as the moon setting faded back into the normal room look.  The photo appeared before me in my hands and I gazed at it in awe.  It was such an awesome pic.  Had the texture and look of a lithogram image and it displayed all of us just as we stood as it was about to be made.  The other Rangers all gathered up behind me looking over my shoulder and head to get a gander at the picture.

"Nice smile, Zhane," Ashley laughed and gave the Silver Ranger a playful shove.

"Hey, what was that for," he teased and gave Ashley an innocent look.  I sort of chuckled as they goofed around.  Andros pointed and said how pretty Karone looked.  Cassie didn't say much.  Just stared and smiled.

"Once again, guys, thanks.  You don't know how much this means to me," I thanked again.

"Hey, it was no problem, Teej," Cassie said, finally saying something after a long period of silence between the both of us.

I smiled and sort of gave everyone a group hug.  I didn't feel awkward about it, because now, they were more than just friends to me, they were like a family.

"Hey, let's get something to eat, I'm starved," Carlos declared and made his way to the exit.

"Mmm... sounds good," Karone proclaimed and everyone began to head out.  I stood for a moment waiting for them to all leave.  However, Cassie noticed I didn't follow.

"You coming, T.J.," she inquired.

"Uh.. yeah, I'll be there in a while," I said.

"All right, then," Cassie uttered and left.  I was alone in the Simudeck.  I wanted to take one more picture, but this time, alone.  If I was to give these pictures to my mom as a final remnant of her son, I wanted them to be perfect.

"DECA, can you initiate one more photo," I requested.

"Of course, T.J., just one moment while I prepare," she responded.

"All right, thanks," I said, gratified, and tinkered with the Simudeck settings.  I was tempted to input the moon setting again, but I wanted something more exotic and different for this photo.  I couldn't think of anything at all.  Then, I sort of thought of something.  I was rather strange to make myself look like I was standing on thin air, but I decided to go along with it anyway.  With the push of a few buttons a space scene appeared with the planet Earth in the far distance.  This was more of a background than an actual setting.  I took my position in front and alerted DECA that I was ready.

"All right DECA...," I said positioning myself.  ".. whenever you're ready."

Once again a huge flashed appeared before me and blinded me like crazy, but it was well worth it.  As before, the picture appeared in my hand and it was rather nice picture.  It was... me.  Really no other way to describe it.  I let out a joyful, yet a small sorrowful, sigh.

"Thanks DECA, appreciate it," I thanked for the millionth time that day.

"Glad to help, T.J.," she responded.  For the first time, I could actually feel her sincerity.  I exited the room that had supplied much needed help.

I returned to my room to prepare these photos to give to my mom.  I sat at the desk trying to come up with some final words to write on it.  It took a while, but I finally came up with something:

As I wrote this final form of communication I would have with my mom after I left these with her, a tear rolled down my cheek.  I knew for sure now that life is not going to be the same anymore.  I could only hope that God steers me in the right path from this point on.

"Lord, please help me," I yelled in my mind as I looked up at the ceiling.  A small knock came on my door once again.

"Who is it," I asked.

"Carlos."

"Come in," I said and the door slid upward and revealed my closest friend.

"Hey," he greeted walking into the room.

"Hey," I responded back wiping that tear away without facing him.

"What's going on," he questioned.

"Oh, nothing, just writing something," I answered not making eye contact trying not to draw attention to what I was writing.  I know that they graciously accepted to help me with this, but I still didn't want Carlos to see what I was writing.

"Well, Teej, we're kind of worried about you.  You haven't said much or done much with us ever since we left KO-35," Carlos said taking a seat on my bed.

"Sorry about that, I've just been really preoccupied," I uttered with a sigh.  "Seriously though, as soon as I finish up here, I'll be there to join you guys, promise."

"All right, T.J.  We just wanted to make sure things are cool with you," Carlos beamed making his way towards the door.  "Catch you later then."

"Yeah, thanks," I replied and he exited.  The door fell shut again and I stared at the message I wrote on the back of my individual picture.  I shook my head to get back on track again.  Fortunately, I had one of those big orange envelopes inside my desk, so I lucked out with something to put them in.  Steadily and slowly, I slid the photos in and folded the aluminum envelope fastener.  Now that that was taken care, I figured I should go join the others.  Being secluded is not a good thing.

I quickly got up from the chair and exited my room, scanning both directions as I exited to see if any of the others were around.  Apparently not or I would have greeted them.  I could hear Ashley and the others laughing all the way from the Bridge.  There was one thing that I pondered as the laughing echoed down the hall.  How come I was the only concerned one on this ship?  Am I perhaps making too much of a big deal of the future?  These questions continued to float in my mind and I figured I would never find the answer to them.  I headed towards the Bridge as the doors slid halfway in a circle and then the other half opened up revealing the Bridge.  Strangely, I found them playing an unfamiliar video game on the main viewing screen.  It was like some intergalactic fighting game.  Zhane was going up against Karone, and she seemed to have the upper hand.

"Hey guys," I greeted with a small salute I have a habit of doing for some reason.  "What's up?"

Andros turned his head laughing.

"Oh, hey T.J., come on, you're just in time to see my sister whoop Zhane," he humored.  Karone laughed at his comment while Zhane continued to hit the controller like crazy since it seemed not to be executing his tactics against Karone.

"What is this," I asked curiously watching the action on the viewing screen.

"It was a very popular game on KO-35 a few years back.  I was surprised I still had it in my room under all this other stuff I brought after the battle against Dark Specter.  DECA programmed it to work in the ship's computers and designed some controllers with it," he informed me.

"Hmm... looks sort of fun," I smiled wryly.

Cassie and Carlos continued to watch Karone and Zhane go at it at the game acting like ring announcers and such.  I took a seat behind one of the consoles and stared at my fellow Rangers for a moment.  They were all just.... so happy.  Why couldn't I enjoy myself as well?  No matter though, this fear of things no longer the same has caused me to worry now, and it's going to take a lot for it to go away.

Soon, after Carlos, Cassie, and Andros got their fair chance against Karone who seemed to be kicking everyone's butt at the game, they asked me to play as well.

"Come on, T.J., give it a shot.  It's cool," Carlos offered.

"Uh..., I'm not sure, I'm not really good at video games," I replied wanting to decline.

"Come on, Teej," Cassie said standing up to her feet and grabbing my hand while dragging me to her spot. "Give it one shot, it won't hurt."

"All right," I sighed and caved into their demands of playing the game.  Carlos handed me the controller.  It looked weird, and just holding it was even more weirder.  It had a strange shape.  I've always seen those normal oval ones, but this one had the look of a strange.... I don't know.  Hard to describe.

"You understand I'm not going to make it easy for you," Karone threatened humorously.  I gave her a grin and pressed the start button and the game simulation began.  Strangely, the fighters in this game were like a mixture of animal species.  The game wasn't crude like most fighting games with blood and gore all over the place.  Karone advanced on me with a swift kick, and since I had no idea what I was doing, I was pressing all the buttons at the same time.  She still continued to kick my butt across the screen until she eventually won.

"Good game, Karone," I said with a smile.

"Thanks.  You did pretty good, unlike some people," Karone joked giving Zhane a funny look.

"Hey, I could have beat you, except the controller wouldn't do what I wanted to," he retaliated.

"Sure, uh-huh, right," Karone teased again laughing.  In the midst of all the laughter, DECA alerted us about finally reaching the Earth.

"Rangers, we are about to reach Earth.  Should we land?"  DECA asked.

"Uh.. no, just orbit the planet for now, DECA," Andros ordered, but not in a real commanding way.  More in a suggestive tone.

"As you command, Andros," she responded.

Since we had finally arrived to Earth, I thought it was good time to take care of business.

"Guys, since we have finally reached Earth, I'm going to head down to take care of a few things," I said.

"T.J., are you sure that's a good idea," Ashley questioned hesitantly.

"Yeah, I really need to go down.  It's important," I said clearly and firmly.

"But... people know about us now.  If they were to see you..," Carlos voiced, but I cut him off.

"Look, I'll be okay.  I'll try not get caught, but I really need to go down there," I stressed to all of them.

The others just sort of glanced at each other with now worried looks on their faces just as I have been having since our ascent from KO-35.

"Just be careful," Cassie said with concern.

"I will, I should be back in a few hours," I said and exited the Bridge.

After I got dressed in pressed black jeans, with a blue long sleeve dress shirt, black leather jacket, brown shoes, and I was ready to head down to Earth.  I wished I could have concealed the orange envelope, but it didn't fit in my jacket.  I bid a temporary farewell to the other Rangers on the Bridge.  They all waved and wished me luck, and once again, warned me to be careful.  Of course, they were right to warn me.  Finding our identities, I bet, is a big deal everywhere on Earth

I stood in the work bay getting ready to teleport to Earth, but Cassie called out to me to wait a second.

"Teej..," she yelled out running down the hall and entering.

My finger barely tapped the button on my Astro Morpher, but didn't initiate the teleporting sequence, so I lucked out on that.

"What is it, Cassie," I asked.

"Listen...," she trailed off a bit.  "I just want to apologize for, well, you know walking out without any response to your feelings for me.  I was quite surprised by it."

"No, really, it's okay.  Like I said, I just needed to get that off my chest, so don't worry about it.  I completely understand if you don't feel the same way," I explained while taking a step back.  I have no idea why I did that.  I didn't want to make it seem like I was being nervous around her, because I wasn't.

"Actually..." she trailed off again.

"Yes..." I inquired waiting for her to finish her sentence.

"I don't know... I kind of have feelings for you as well, but... for the Phantom too.  I just can't seem to choose between the two of you," Cassie said with an unsure tone.  I sat the envelope on the work bay table.

"Cassie...," I said slowly walking up to her and held her soft slender hands within mine.  "It's all right, honestly.  Whoever you choose, whether it be me, or Phantom, I'm totally okay with.  It's just that I found something about you that made you extra special in my eyes.  I just wanted to let you know, that's all."

Cassie smiled a bit and gave me a hug.  "You're sweet, you know that?"

I sort of laughed a bit embarrassed and flattered.

"Well, I'll let you go do what you need to do.  Good luck, T.J.," she said softly.

"Thanks, I'll be back soon.  Until then," I responded grabbing the envelope again and sticking it under my left arm.  She smiled as I pressed the teleporter on my Astro Morpher and I was on my way to my home town, Crescent City.

It was pretty dark already, so that helped keep my face well hidden from people who happen to be around at night.  I landed in a secluded area of the city park and examined the area around me.  Not much changed within the last year and half.  Everything was very recognizable and I walked down the trail to find my way to the small neighborhood streets.  Fortunately, my house wasn't too far away, just a few blocks away.  As I walked, a nostalgic childhood feeling ran throughout my body.  I began to remember what I was like growing up here.  Memories of riding my bike, playing basketball, hitting baseballs, and just being me.  Somehow, things changed after my father's death, and I no longer had a passion to show true happiness as a child anymore.  After becoming a Ranger, things changed though.  I felt important.

I finally reached my house.  A two story house with a nice crisp green lawn.  The house was made of red bricks with white paint bordering certain areas of the house.  My room was on the upper level left hand corner of the house.  Of course, now it was deserted since I no longer lived there.  I sighed to think about how alone Mom felt.  She has nobody to live with or take care of her.  I guess it was sort of selfish of me to go to Angel Grove to improve my baseball, but it was a final request of my father for me to go and train with Jake Rosetti.  He wanted me to become a great baseball player, but I don't think either of us took into consideration the idea of something happening to either of us, whether it be death or some other situation.

The light in the living room shined through a window.  It wasn't very clear to see inside since my mom had the curtains covering it.  I decided to go through the back way of the house.  I hoped that the back garage door was unlocked.  I didn't want to just go up and ring the doorbell and take the risk of somebody being with her and then my cover would be blown.  I walked to the side of the house and opened the gate as it squeaked.  I could hear a subtle crackling of grass, as if somebody was approaching me.  A little jingle could also be heard as it got closer.

"Spotty?  Is that you," I asked trying to see through the utter darkness.  He came up to me panting and whimpering happily.

"Hey, boy, how you doing," I asked petting him.  I hadn't seen him for a while.  He had gotten a bit bigger since I last saw him.  I got him back about five years ago.  My mom brought home this Dalmation from the humane society while I was at school.  I was so shocked to see him when I got home.  I had always wanted a pet of my own.  I named him 'Spotty' since the name fit so well with his physical appearance.

"Yeah, it's nice to see you too, boy," I said giving him a final playful pet on his back.  I scanned to the back side of the house to find the door that lead into the garage.  I tried turning the cool, slightly drenched door knob, but with no avail.  It was locked.

"Dang, it's locked...", I sighed.  I rubbed my forehead trying to relax.   I removed the envelope from under my arm and held it in my left hand so I wouldn't lose it or drop it.  I had almost forgot I even had it with me.  Probably would have been a good idea for me to bring a backpack or something.

"I suppose I should just go ring the door bell," I thought to myself.  "I shouldn't get all dramatic with this.  I need to see and talk to her anyway."

I went back to the front of the house and slowly walked up to the front door.  I sighed and prepared myself mentally.  I pushed the little orange button on the side of the door and a little ring could be heard from the inside.  I breathed out ready to face my mom.  The door opened and there she stood behind the glass door.

"Hello," she greeted.  "Can I help you with something?"

I assumed she didn't recognized me.  Either that... or somehow miraculously forgot she had a son.

"Uh... Mom, it's me," I said softly and a bit fretful.

"T.J....," she questioned slowly opening the glass door to see if it was really me.  "Is that you?"

I nodded and responded softly once again, "Yeah.. it's me."

She came fully from behind the door and looked over me and lifted my face up with her hand.  Tears formed in her eyes and she gave me a big hug.  I hugged her as well, but was too.... I don't know, I couldn't describe it.  I just didn't get too emotional with it.

"Come on, let's go inside," she suggested.

"Sure thing," I responded and we both went in.

I entered the house and it looked perfect.  Almost as perfect or better than it looked like before I left for Angel Grove a little over a year ago.  She showed me around the house.  I could tell it had been redecorated a bit.  Leave it to mom to do that kind of stuff.  We both went into the kitchen and I sat at the round table.  She went to the refrigerator pulling out some food and a couple of sodas.  I was feeling a bit hot, so I removed my jacket and placed it on the back of my chair.

"So, Mom, how have you been," I asked with concern.

"Oh, I've been doing really good.  Catching up on work, getting more involved with the church, and all the good stuff," she responded cutting some salad and tomatoes.

"Good, I'm glad to hear you're doing great here alone," I smiled.  I sincerely was happy that she was managing on her own.  But of course, a grown adult and mother is capable of doing that.  I'm not saying that she was not able to, I was just always concerned.  I was the only one left to take care of her in case something happened.  I didn't want to find out one day that something tragic has or had happened to her.  I don't know if I could ever live with the guilt of leaving her when I left to Angel Grove.

"So, how are things going in Angel Grove with Jake Rosetti," mom asked me still chopping away.  Somehow, her asking that threw me off.  I expected her to ask about the Power Ranger thing.  There's no way she couldn't have known about it.  It had to be big news across the entire world.  Either she knew and was dancing around the bush, or simply just didn't want to bring it up.

"Um.. things are going pretty good in Angel Grove.  Jake is teaching me quite a bit...," I answered with a nervous smile.  Perhaps I should bring up the subject.  There is no need for this charade.  It's inevitable that we will talk about this tonight, one way or another.

"Mom, there's something I gotta tell you," I said sort of childishly.  I felt somewhat like a baby in the tone I said it in, but I think most kids act like this with their parents, although they never admit it.

"What is it, dear," she asked slapping on vegetables and cold cuts into sandwiches.

"Look..., I just want to tell you that while I was living in Angel Grove with a friend, I was selected to be a Power Ranger and I've been one for almost two years now," I announced to her wondering what her reaction would be.  If she knew already, then it wouldn't be a big shock, but if she didn't.... I don't know how she would take it.

"Yes, I heard about that on the news earlier this evening," was all she said setting a plate and soda can in front of me with a sandwich placed on top of the plate.  The thought of "she took that rather well" ran through my mind.  I guess if she already knew, then there was nothing to really worry about anymore about revealing that secret.  But there is the thing of giving her details she has the right to know about.  I just sat there and looked over my sandwich.  She took a seat across the table, and began to eat.  I examined my sandwich and took a bite of it.  It was rather good.  Of course, food seem to taste better when you mom makes them than when you make them yourself.  I continued to sit there trying to think of a way to ease in a conversation with her telling more of what happened in Angel Grove.  However, my thoughts were distracted by a sniffle.  I lifted my head up and saw a tear fall to the table.

"Mom, what's wrong," I inquired curiously.

"Nothing, T.J...," she said softly sniffling.

"Are you sure," I inquired once again.  I knew she wasn't.  You just don't start crying without a reason.  It took a while, but she finally admitted what was bothering her.

"T.J..., today, when I saw you on T.V. risking your life to save the universe as a Power Ranger, I felt like I literally fell apart.  I didn't know what was going on, and then to have you involved, it worried me to death.  I was afraid that something had happened to you, or something was going to happen to you.  I couldn't bear the thought of losing you as well," she admitted crying even harder.  I sat in my chair, swallowing in slight sadness.  This was a bigger deal than I thought.  I just never realized how taxing this would be on her.  I got up from my chair and knelt in front of her chair embracing her in a hug.

"Mom..., it's okay..," I managed to say holding back the choking feeling of wanting to cry.  "Shhh..., nothing to worry about anymore.  I'm still here.  I'm sorry you had to find out the way you did.  I would never do anything to hurt you."  I continue to hold her in my arms as she cried on my left shoulder.  Was it really worth becoming a Power Ranger?  Would the outcome of being a super hero and saving the world always have results like this?  No, that's negative thinking.  I can't think like that.  Becoming a Power Ranger was a childhood dream of mine ever since I first heard about their existence.  Like I told Cassie when we first met, they've accomplished a lot for mankind, and today was the biggest accomplishment of all.  I released my hold on her and looked straight into her tear stricken eyes.

"The battle is over now.  Evil has been completely destroyed.  The universe is at peace now.  You don't have to worry anymore, we've finally won," I uttered softly.

This time, she embraced me in a tight hug and all I could do was stand still as she showed her motherly love for me.  In the midst of all this emotional activity, I couldn't show it.  Mom was willing to, but me, it wouldn't show for some strange reason.

"Mom, listen to me for a second," I ordered.  "I never knew I would become a Ranger.  I never admitted this to you or dad, but I always wanted to be one.  That day I left for Angel Grove, I was chosen to be one.  This was a big step in my life.  I was chosen to be leader at the time, so that was even tougher to make the decision.  But I went with it, and met my destiny."

She nodded.  "I understand, T.J.  All people must meet their destinies at one point in their lives."

We fell silent for a small moment.  I noticed the pictures I left leaning against the right back foot of my chair.  I went to retrieve it and pulled up the chair that was next to my mom's chair so I could be close to her.

"I also brought you something, but before I give these to you, I would like to tell you of another big decision I've had to make today.  I feel it's yet another destiny I must go through with," I informed her, looking sadly at the floor.

She had no initial response.  I looked at her after taking my eyes off the ground, and I could tell she wanted to hear what I had to say.

"As you know, during the biggest battle of our lives, we revealed our identities to the world.  It was one of the biggest decisions we had to make.  We couldn't allow the forces of Evil to take over without fighting to the end.  However, letting the world know of our identities has aroused suspicion.  It's no longer the same to live a normal life," I explained.  I sighed and got to the point of what I was saying.

"What I'm trying to say is...," I stopped in the middle of the sentence.  I shut my eyes and completed it with as dread filled my entire body.  "I think I might have to leave again.  This time, I'm not sure if I can return for a very long time."  As those words came out of my mouth, sorrow and pain just consumed my mind and heart, I literally felt I was weakened to nothing.  Although it was a state of mind, telling her I had to leave again depressed me.  I didn't want to leave her if I did have a choice.  But I don't.  Dad's death was rather hard for her to deal with.  Now that he's has been gone for so long, I felt now that it was my responsibility to take care of her and tend to her like a loving son would.

"T.J...," she uttered.  "You've experienced what very few men do or even imagine.  You've gone through so much during this time period and I'm very proud of you.  If you feel this is something you have to do, I will support you.  I will always support you in any decision you make.  I love you."

I smiled at her and was relieved that she wasn't heartbroken at my big decision.  Yet, I still had one thing to ask her.

"But... how will you continue on with life without somebody to be with you," I asked curiously with much caring in my heart.

"Oh, there's no need to worry.  While you've been gone, I've been getting closer with some people at church, and we visit each other often to see how we're doing.  We help each other out a lot and they know about you growing up and fulfilling your baseball passion.  No need to worry about me getting lonely or anything," she smiled with much confidence.  I could see in her eyes as they lit with honesty and happiness that things were going good before I came back.  I was relieved in my heart that in my absence, people were looking after her for me.

"I love you too, Mom.  I will always love you," I spoke softly.  We fell silent again for a brief moment.  A sense of security filled my heart.  I said everything I wanted to say and positive reactions were the results.  I knew now that things would be cool from here on out with Mom.  I looked down at my feet and noticed the envelope was still in my possession.  I was so caught up in telling her all that, I totally forgot to give it to her.

"Hmm..., forgot all about this.  This is for you, it's sort of final reminder of me until I can return one day," I said handing it to her with a small smile.  She happily accepted it and began tinkering with the back of it trying to open up the fasteners.  After doing so, she pulled one of the two photos enclosed inside.  The first one happened to be the one of the Rangers and myself.

"T.J., this photo... it's....," she stammered a bit with surprise.  "It's wonderful...."  I sat smiling and grinning as she continued to praise how great the picture was.  She continued to scan the picture looking over each of us.  I was pleased that she liked them.  I was hoping she would.  DECA is a great piece of technology.

"These are the other Rangers, correct?" she asked with curiosity.

"Yeah, those are the rest of them... well, except her," I said pointing to Karone.  "She's this guy's sister."

I pointed to Andros and she nodded.

"Why don't you tell me a little about them.  They all seem like wonderful nice people," she commented.

"All right... who she would start with...," I trailed off a bit trying to think of which one of the Rangers I should tell her about.  She pointed to Carlos, who held his right arm out as if he was going to morph.  From our point of view, he was on the left side of the picture.

"Oh, that's Carlos.  He was the Black Ranger.  He's my best friend, well, I consider him that," I smiled.  "He's pretty good in sports.  Especially soccer.  He's a really nice guy."

"And who is this young lady right here," she asked pointing to Cassie standing on the right side of Carlos from the position you looked at the photo.  She held up her left wrist with her hand in a fist, showing her Astro Morpher and smiling gorgeously, as she always did.

"This lovely woman is Cassie," I happily said.  If there was one person I knew quite a bit about, it was Cassie.  "She was the Pink Ranger.  Cassie was the very first person I met in Angel Grove.  To be more exact, that day I left, we met on the bus.  We were chosen to take the places of the Pink and Red Turbo Rangers before we became Space Rangers.  She's a really nice girl.  Beautiful too.  She writes music and plays the guitar occasionally."

"Hmm.... I sense you have a likeness for this girl..," she slowly remarked.

"What?  Me like her?  No way," I nervously stammered.  "She's just.... a good friend, that's all."

"Come on, T.J., give me the benefit of the doubt.  A mother always knows what their kids are thinking.  Plus, you seem to indicate it by expressing how beautiful she was," she smiled.

"Okay, okay, so maybe I do like her a little...," I admitted trying to avoid making eye contact with her.  I could feel she was staring at me and she gave me one of those motherly stares.

"All right, all right, I like her a lot," I sighed and began to feel a little bit embarrassed.  Talking to Mom about love made me uneasy, but I knew I could trust her, so that gave me some satisfaction in admitting it.

"Have you told her how you feel," she inquired.

"Uh.., yeah, earlier, I did tell her how I felt.  We talked a little bit about it before I left to come see you.  I think I'll go talk to her more about it when I get back," I declared with the nervousness beginning to fade.  There was no more reason to feel threatened by embarrassment.  I actually began to feel comfortable talking to her about it.

"Well, I hope everything goes well between you two," she confidently said.

"Thanks," I smiled.  "Shall we continue with the rest of the Rangers?"

"Yes, that would be nice," she replied.  "How about this fellow with the goofy grin?"

"Oh, that's Zhane, the Silver Ranger," I introduced.  "He has this thing for always acting funny and pulling stuff on people, but he's a good friend to have.  Good guy for a laugh once in a while."

"Ah, I see.  He looks like a nice kid," she commented.

"Yeah, he sure is, they all are," I softly said.  I was being sincere.  They were a great group of friends.  Each Ranger had a special characteristic that shined perfectly.  I'm a pretty lucky guy to have friends like that.  To fall back on for help, to talk to, have someone who would listen, and above all, just to be around.  We've had our fair share of problems, but it was nothing a little understanding and talking couldn't take care of.

"What about this pretty young lady right here," she asked pointing to Ashley who was on Andros's left side and putting her arm around his waist.

"That's Ashley Hammond, the Yellow Ranger.  She's a very nice girl.  She has a lot of...., how do I say this, perkiness.  She's just this happy, bubbly person.  That's pretty much it about her.  She also does some cheer leading as well," I answered.

"Hmmm...., your friends, each of them has a chemistry of their own, which supplies a lot to your team.  Be kind of boring if all of you were all alike," Mom remarked.  She was right though.   Each Ranger did supply something to the team that the others couldn't.  That was invaluable to the fight against evil.

"What about these two right here," she inquired pointing to Andros and Karone.

"This guy, I have to be honest, is one of the most interesting people I've met in my entire life.  His name is Andros.  He's a human from another planet called KO-35.  He was the Red Ranger.  He's a pretty nice guy.  At first, he felt a little threatened by our presence, but after a while, he gained a trust in us.  He's one remarkable wise person if I ever saw one.  The girl next to him is Karone, his sister.  Originally, she was Astronema, the evil force we were fighting against.  She was kidnapped as a child as her and Andros were playing.  Now, she is back to her old self since evil has been destroyed," I explained.

"Wow, two humans from a totally different planet, huh?  That's got be a unique experience.  Meeting people from another planet, I mean," she noted to me.  Andros, what a guy.  After all he's gone through, he still managed to keep going.  That's something that Earth humans tend to have problems with.  But Andros, he might not have the physical appearance of strength, but man, has he got a heart and tons of inner strength.  A true warrior.

"Well, after you telling me about all them, they've got to be an exceptional group of friends," she declared with a smile.

"Oh yeah, they're great.  I consider them like a family to me," I uttered with a nod.

I stood staring blindly at the window.  Just remembering all we had been through.  It was one wild ride after another.  From the time we arrived in space, to the battle of survival with Darkonda, and all the way up to the final battle for the universe.  We had gone through a lot for the past year.  It brought us closer together not just as Rangers, but as regular people with a common goal.  As I thought about that, I didn't notice my mom searching the envelope again and pulling out the one I took alone.

"T.J?!" she called out to me.

"Huh?  What?  Oh, sorry about that... just thinking of things.  What's up?" I asked informally.

"I absolutely adore this picture of you alone.  It's beautiful.  This is something I will definitely treasure for the rest of my life.  To have a photo of my son during his Power Ranger era is something extremely special, and this illustrates it very well," she positively commented.  "How did you manage to get these anyway?"

I smiled and would happily tell her I how I obtained them.

"Well, at our base of command, called the Astro Megaship, there's this computer DECA.  She's like this super intelligent program.  Has the ability to do tons of things.  One of them happened to be taking photographs.  So, I requested that she take some, and she happily agreed to. The backgrounds you see, they came from this other computer program called the Simudeck.  You can program it to make it look like anywhere you want.  That's how I got them," I grinned explaining it as clearly as possible.  Not everyday you explain how technology from a totally different world functions.

"I must say, you've done and experienced a lot as a Ranger.  Tell me, what was it like being one for so long?" she queried.  This question sort of blew me away.  It was astounding that she asked how it felt.  I never thought I would ever be asked that question.  Then again, it never came to mind that the world would eventually find out who we really were.  I decided to go ahead and tell her, as long as she kept it secret though.

"It was a rather unique experience.  It was a constant battle against the forces of evil.  When I was chosen by the former Red Turbo Ranger, whose name I won't mention for his sake, it sort of blew me away.  I mean, this honor was bestowed on me and I didn't know how to react.  Then, I was told I would be leader, and that made things more interesting.  At times, I did have doubts about leading the team, but as time went on, I slowly gained more experience in it and it became like second nature," I explained.  Mom sat still for a second taking it all in and nodding.

"I see...," she softly said.  "How about telling me about some of the battles you and your friends went through?"

It went like this for about an hour and half.  I continued to tell her about that day I became a Ranger and times after that.  I gave her a small introduction to the villains we fought against and why we had gone into space.  She was intrigued the whole time.  As I talked, I realized the reason why I chose to leave.  I didn't want to have to deal with these questions.  Mom, I didn't mind telling her.  But the press, the world, that would be an uncomfortable thing.  I wouldn't enjoy being in the spotlight like that, and I'm sure the other Rangers wouldn't want to be either.

It must have been a little past 11:30 when I had finished explaining almost the entire Ranger journey we had experienced.  She found it rather fascinating.  Once in a while, she would throw in questions asking if I was okay at the time.  Like the battle with Psycho Blue and I was badly injured.  When I explained the whole thing about the final battle, she actually didn't know how much was a stake.  I don't think many people knew though, only the people of Angel Grove could experience that feeling.

I looked at my communicator and the time indicated 11:37 p.m.  We had just finished talking.

"Mom..., I think I should be on my way now.  It's getting late and I have one more place to visit before I head back to home," I voiced in a dispirited tone.  The time to leave had finally arrived after spending so few hours with her.  Time seemed to have gone by quickly today.

"Are you sure, T.J....," she trailed off grabbing my hand.  "I know we talked about you leaving earlier, but are positively sure you want to do this?  We can find some way to work around what's bothering you."

"Thanks," I replied gratefully.  "But this is something I feel I must do.  In my heart, I don't want to leave you, but I must.  I will someday return, I promise."

Her shoulders dropped with a depressed look on her face.  She nodded and replied, "I understand... T.J."

A rush of emotion filled my body and I embraced her in yet another hug.  A tear rolled down my face as I held her.  I would deeply miss her.

"Mom, I love you..." I murmured.

"I love you too, dear.... I'm really doing to miss you," she replied warmheartedly.  I released the hug and picked up my jacket that remained hanging on the backrest.  We both exited the kitchen and reached the door.  I opened door and pushed against the glass door opening it half way.  I turned to see mom for the last time in a long time.  I could see a tear roll off her cheek and hit the floor.

"Good-bye, Mom.  Take care of yourself," I bid farewell for the last time.

"You too, my son," she stammered a bit from the powerful emotion she was feeling.  I nodded in response and shut the door behind me as I stood in the front porch.  I slipped on my jacket and headed down the street to my final destination for the night.

I finally reached the cemetery where my father was buried a little over 10 years ago.  The day of his burial consumed my mind and I could feel it happen all over again.  I shook my head at the thought and tried to figure a way in.  The gates had been locked and there seem to be no way to get in.

"DECA, sorry to bother you, but I need you to teleport me inside the cemetery," I requested talking into my communicator.

"Getting coordinates now," she responded.  "Location confirmed, teleporting you now."

"Thanks, DECA," I replied in gratitude.  A few seconds later, I landed behind the main building where people would request burial areas.  I knew this was this was the correct building since we came here to ask if Dad could be buried here.  Thinking of that time period ten years ago depressed me, so I tried not to think about it from that point on out.  I had a hard time locating his grave though.  It was dark and I couldn't navigate myself correctly.  I attempted to find a familiar spot where his grave was located.  It took a while, but eventually found it.  I knelt in front of it.  It was hard to see at first, but the clouds that covered the moon had shifted to the east, so now it was clear and visible to read.

"Hey, dad," I greeted quietly.  "How's it going?  Sorry for not coming to visit you in a long time.  Life has definitely been in my face the last few years."

"So, how are things going in heaven?" I asked humorously.  "Hmph, I shouldn't even be asking that.  Everything is fine there."

"I just wanted to stop by and say thanks for being such a great dad and all.  I know I've probably said this tons of times, but I just want to make sure it's sincere this time now that I'm older and wiser than I was as a kid.  Thanks for being supportive with baseball and all.  I don't know where I'd be without you," I sighed.  "You and Mom have been great.  Thanks for giving me life, loving me, and the list could go on forever.  I love you, Dad.  Miss you a lot."

I lowered my head and just took a moment of silence to pray.  Pray for mom, that God would put his loving hand over her and take care of her.  For dad, hoping that he's happy in his new life with Him.  For the Rangers, that God will continue to work in their lives and be the great friends they've been for the last two years.  And finally, for myself, that He will guide me through the long path that is Life.

"My life is and has always been in your hands, Lord.  Please guide me now as I venture on," I tenderly requested.  I took a few steps back from the grave.

"See you soon, dad," I said in farewell and walked down the cool, shadowy necropolis, and the darkness consumed me at a far distance.

"DECA, I'm heading back to the Megaship," I whispered into my communicator.  Man, I was exhausted already.  This day was taxing on my mind and physical body.  It must have been around 12:30 a.m. now.

"All right, T.J." DECA responded.  I hit the teleportation button on my communicator and within seconds, I was back in the work bay.  It was very quiet.  All that could be heard was the light humming of the ship's engines and small beeps of computers.

"Are the others around, DECA?  Sorry to keep bothering you like this...", I threw in.  I felt like I was asking too much of DECA today.  Probably growing weary of my voice by now.

"It's quite all right, T.J.  Ashley and Andros are alone, as well as Karone and Zhane.  Carlos has went to sleep, and Cassie is in her room as well," she informed me.  I guess everyone was pretty busy now.  The two couples probably talking about their relationships, no doubt.  Now that relationships popped into my mind, I figured I would go talk to Cassie about this thing again.  Really didn't discuss it fully before I left.  I walked down the long corridor of Mega Deck 5 and finally arrived at Cassie's door.

"Cassie, you awake," I said after softly tapping on her door.

There was no answer.

"Cassie, are you in there?  Everything all right?" I asked once again.  Still no answer.  Strange, why wouldn't she answer if she was in her room.  Just then, the door opened as it slid open from the bottom inserting itself in the crevice on the top area of the door.

"I'm here, T.J.," Cassie answered.

"You all right?  I called for you twice, but didn't answer," I uttered seriously.

"Yeah, I'm fine.... I was just, uh...," Cassie trailed off a bit.  I gave her a curious look.  She seemed to be awfully nervous and was stammering a bit in her speech.

I gave her a small grin.  "I have a feeling things are not okay."

"I can't hide this.... T.J., I've made my decision.  I love the Phantom......," she admitted quickly and taking a step back.  As she did that, a shadowy figure came up from behind her.  It was the Phantom Ranger.   A feeling of shock and surprise ran through my body.  I just sort of smiled at the both of them.  To be honest, I wasn't heartbroken at all.  I knew her heart belonged mostly to the Phantom, and as long as she acquires what her heart desires, I would be nothing but happy for her.

"Cass..., talk to you for just one minute," I said stressing the 'one' in a joke like manner.   She didn't have a verbal response, but just came up to me as we went a few steps down the hallway to talk privately.

"I assume a lot has happened while I was gone for the last few hours, huh?" I inquired.  She still didn't respond.  The look of disappointment and embarrassment could be read through her facial expression and body language.

"Hey, what's with the sad face?" I asked contentedly.

"I... just feel bad about all this," she nervously voiced.  "I didn't want to hurt you."

"Cassie.." I called out putting my arm around her neck in a friendly gesture. "I'm not hurt at all.  I'm glad you followed your heart.  If you felt like it was for the Phantom, it's totally cool with me.  Like I said earlier, I didn't expect you to return the feelings I had.  That's just me.  We all have different feelings for people.  The only thing that matters to me now is our friendship."

She looked up and a small smile began to form on her face.  "Really?"

"Yeah," I said with a big smile.  "Come here." I gave her a huge friendly hug.

"Go," I ordered with a head gesture pointing to Phantom who was looking at us from her doorway.  "Talk to him, get to know him."

She gave me a puppy face smile and slowly went back to the man she truly had feelings for.  I smiled as they both went inside her room and the door fell shut.

I laughed with exasperation.  Love was an indeed strange concept to most people.  I just happened to fall under that category.  It didn't worry me though.  Someday, I will meet my true love and be as happy as Cassie and Phantom are.  After realizing that, a strange heaviness in my heart was lifted and I no longer felt the same about the concept of love as I did before.  I shook my head and chuckled a bit.  It was already late, and I might as well relax a bit before going to sleep.  After changing into my space jump suit, I just sat on the window seat staring at different areas of the room with the lamp emanating a small glow.  Much like earlier that day.  I directed my attention to my desk and noticed this small green book I had left leaning against the lamp.  It was like this guide book to certain issues that we deal with in life.  Much of it was very true.  I recently bought the book and would read the lesson, but lately, couldn't find the time for it for obvious reasons.  I got up from the window area and grabbed the book off the desk and sat on my bed while flipping through the pages I've read.   Finally found page twenty seven and read the large printed advice for the day.

This particular message blew me away in my mind.  This was exactly what I had experienced the entire day.  I read through the example of how this worked into a famous writer by the name of Catherine Marshall.  The basic message behind all this was when any of us have made a tough doubting decision in our life through arrogance, lack of faith, or fear.... God will show us the way out.  After reading that, I slowly shut the book and sat it on the bottom half of my bed.  I propped my feet on the lower end of the bed and rested my head on the soft pillow, enduring the relaxation.  There was nothing left to do now.  I've laid out the plays, and now it's time to go through with them.  The thoughts of how tomorrow and the rest of my life would turn out danced in my head for a while.  I had made this decision out of some fear, but now it's time for me to come within God's reach and let him show me the way.  With that final thought, my eyes fell shut, resting and preparing for the future at hand.